Baller & Squalor Week 11: Brees, Browns, & Dak Prescott’s Plight

Who kicked ass? Who sucked? It’s the Week 11 edition of Baller & Squalor!


Drew Brees

As I’m sitting here writing this, I’m watching two “football experts” suckling at the teat of the Philadelphia Eagles and I can’t help but wonder if people will ever realize just how good the New Orleans Saints are this year? Drew Brees is about 67 years old and can still go out and throw for 385 yards and two touchdowns? Get out of here.

I’m 31, I played two games of basketball two days ago, and this morning I couldn’t get out of bed and my knee keeps giving out on me.

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I wish I was as cool and age immune as Drew Brees… must be the mustache.

Brees continues to defy the odds that have seemingly been against him his entire career and now he’s teamed up with one of  the league’s better defenses to push the Saints’ win streak to 8. Also, wasn’t last year supposed to be Brees’ last with the Saints? Hmmm… dodged that bullet.

He’s once again planted himself as one of the league’s top quarterbacks at 4th in yards, 1st in completion percentage, and 3rd in passer rating.  If I’m being honest, Tom Brady is the only other quarterback I would want as my quarterback right now. The dude just knows how to lead a team, and then when he plays at the level he is this year, the Saints are a force to be reckoned with.

Old Man Drew isn’t doing this all by himself, though. There’s another huge player in this #1 ranked offense and he’s next on this week’s Baller list…


Mark Ingram

If someone had told me a few years ago, “Hey, your offense is going to get a lot better, you just have to get rid of Adrian Peterson,” I would have thought that was the craziest thing I had ever heard, but here we are today with Mark Ingram going crazy since the Saints decided to give Peterson the boot. Before that bye week trade with the Cardinals, Ingram only had 170 yards on 42 carries and ZERO touchdowns. Since Ingram reclaimed the feature role in New Orleans he’s had 636 yards, and 8 touchdowns, on 113 carries.

Ingram’s best performance in the post-Peterson era came on Sunday in that OT win over the Redskins when he had 134 yards and a touchdown, earning him the Baller tag for this week.

I swear Mark Ingram is like the Kirk Cousins on running backs. Every year he finds a way to put up pretty solid performances for his team, but the coaches and higher ups just don’t think he’s enough. I really don’t get it.

He’s 4th in rushing yards, tied for 2nd in runs over 20 yards, tied for first in touchdowns, and is over 1000 combined yards already this season. When will Ingram do enough to prove to Sean Payton that he needs to stop window shopping for running back upgrades and realize he’s got something pretty damn good right in front of him.

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The Cleveland Browns

The Browns are 0-10

0 – 10!!!

I’m keeping them on the squalor list every week until they win a game.

This team is so bad in every facet of the game. They can’t pass, they can’t run, they can’t block, their defense is terrible, so on and so forth.

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I can’t just choose one person to take the blame for this either. Off the field the ownership and management is a disgrace to logic and intellect, but on the field the coaching leaves a bit to be desired and the players either don’t know how to play football or they just don’t care anymore.

I want to point the finger at DeShone Kizer and his 3.4 QBR vs. the Jags this week, but it’s the Browns fault for drafting a guy who wasn’t really that good in college, thinking they’d turn him into a competent NFL quarterback.

The ’08 Lions need to watch out. Soon they won’t be the only 0-16 team in the history of the NFL.

God I feel bad for the people of Cleveland right now.


Dak Prescott

Everyone knows that Dak Prescott has struggled this year. That sophomore slump has hit him harder than I’d hoped it would, but can we all agree his owner and teammates haven’t really helped alleviate some of the pressure this season.

Between the offensive line struggling with consistency and injuries this year, the Ezekiel Elliott and the almost great suspension escape distraction, and Jerry Jones doing everything he can to make up for the last few years of lost petulance and asinine behavior we thought he’d finally outgrown, Dak has had a bit of a rough go.

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We finally have crazy Jerry back!

Elliott finally being suspended has definitely made an impact on the Dallas offense, and most notably Prescott himself. He’s averaged only a 26 QBR in his two games without Elliott and this week against the Eagles he had 3 interceptions.


Before this week, Dak had only thrown 8 picks in a season and a half. He had only had two multi interception games giving up 2 to Denver in Week 2 of this year and 2 to the Giants in a December loss last year.

But this week he gave up 3 picks to a division rival and one of the best teams in the entire NFL.

Hopefully Prescott can use this season to get past these growing pains, realize he has to lead this team to wins without Ezekiel Elliott, and turn into the leader everyone thinks he can be. They still have a chance at the playoffs, but if Prescott doesn’t stop playing like Elliott is his crutch, then they don’t stand a chance.




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